Alright, you golf-lovin' degenerates and wannabe pros, listen up!
Uncle Gunter's Golf Gauntlet at Sunset Hills!
Your favorite (and only) Uncle Gunter is draggin' you out of the bar and onto the links for a glorious day of frustration and questionable swings. That's right, we're hosting a golf outing at Sunset Hills on June 29th, and it's gonna be a hoot, or at least a good excuse to drink before noon.
For a mere 30 of your hard-earned dollars, you'll get:
* One round of golf with a tee time of 10 AM. Don't be late, I ain't waitin' for your hungover butts.
* A delicious, much-needed meal back at Uncle Gunter's after you've thoroughly embarrassed yourselves on the course. We'll have stories to tell, mostly at your expense.
Now, a word to the wise: I ain't your chauffeur. You're big boys and girls, so figure out your own damn ride to Sunset Hills. Unless you want to show up on a unicycle, which I'd actually pay to see.
So, dust off those clubs, find your lucky (or just least-stinky) golf shirt, and sign up at the bar. Space is unlimited, and you know how fast word spreads when I'm offering something halfway decent.
See ya on the green, you scoundrels! And remember, no crying on the course, unless it's tears of joy from a truly terrible shot.
Still think you can out-golf your old Uncle Gunter? We'll see about that...
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