Bastard English Session: Sneaky New Year special

I don't know if you know, but Mid-September is the unofficial beginning of the new year. Schools know it. Tim Cook knows it (as Apple's fiscal year begins in September). And now you know it too.

Seriously, do you really want to perform the ritual of seeing in a new year about a week after the shortest, gloomiest day? When it's wet and/or freezing? And you're still recovering from Christmas leftovers?

The correct time is after weeks of playing tunes in hot pub gardens on long summer evenings. When the air is just a little cooler, and the leaves are getting crispy on the edges. And, ideally, when you've had a long holiday somewhere nice and you're ready to get back into it.

So bring songs and tunes about autumn, the best season of the year, and join us in this secret celebration, amongst those who know. Where we will crown someone King Of The Year, drink barrels of ale, and dance a series of bacchanalian 3/2 hornpipes around an oak tree wearing their skin.

Forget that last part.