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Suggested Etiquette for attending Lodges. By: Anonymous Author
Hello everyone! Please remember what you are reading here are not RULES, but merely guidelines that are followed to show respect to the elders who perform ceremonies as well as the ancestors who come be with us during ceremony. We have more than enough rules in our everyday life............
There are many different traditions followed for sweats and they differ depending on the teachings of the person who is running the sweat. Here is what we were taught about preparation for the sweatlodge in a nutshell. You have to be drug and alcohol free for four days prior to entering the sweat, and also as important, there is NO FEE for the sweat, and there should never be one in any tradition. You are never supposed to be paying for a ceremony. If you were not from the same "neighborhood" as the sweat keeper, you may perhaps see if he/she would accept a donation for firewood since most have to buy wood, OR if he/she came to your location for the sweat, you may want to offer him/her some money to feed their "iron horse" so they can get home safely. In many cases, sweat keepers have to buy firewood, unless they can go to their "back 40", assuming they have one. In other cases, I know of sweat keepers who have driven hours away to pour a sweat for people............ The person who has asked the sweat keeper to pour the sweat, should have offered tobacco when they made the request. If as in many cases in the modern age when the request is made via an email or the phone, then it is considered okay to hand the sweat keeper the tobacco when you show up. Any person asking to come in the lodge should offer tobacco to the lodge pourer. (a pinch of tobacco with your prayers is sufficient) . As far as showing up, it is respectful to show up to help with the preparations and not just when it is time to go into the sweat. It is a sweat for everyone, and it is always better that we all help cut the wood, collect the grandfathers, build and light the fire, witness loading the pipe, etc....... We also like to keep in mind that the sweat keeper uses many medicines in order to pour the sweat. If possible, it is always nice to bring one or more of the following to use at the sweat: drinking water, firewood, flatleaf cedar boughs, sage, tobacco, bear oil, sweetgrass, and birch bark. If you are collecting items like the cedar or bark, it is customary to offer tobacco to the trees you are taking part of. (Just remember to give something back when you take something!) Some traditions prefer to sweat in the nude, however that is NOT the case in our traditions..........we have been taught to use modesty, so that our human minds not be distracted by things other than that which we came to do............pray. Men will wear shorts (not denim cutoffs) or a bathing suit, anything is ok as long as there is no metal on it. Women who participate in the lodge must be OFF of their moontime if they still experience them. Women who participate need to be covered from neck to ankle, usually a tee shirt and broomstick skirt works just fine. If you don't have that, you can go someplace like sears/kmart and go buy a long flannel nightie (yes) off of the clearance rack. Again, anything along those lines is ok, providing it has no metal on it. Jewelry also needs to come off too, as it has some degree of metal to it and it could get very hot and burn your skin. You can also bring a towel or two to sit on/cover up with if you get hot. If you are diabetic you should bring some juice for yourself and leave it outside the sweat, just in case your sugar gets low. Usually people bring either cranberry or orange juice. If you have any other medical conditions, you should always take the sweat keeper aside and let him/her know. Please remember that if you wear your sweat clothes to the site of the sweat, you may want to bring some dry clothes to change into on your way home. It is also customary after the sweat is done, to sit outside the lodge quietly and wait for the sweat keeper to take the pipe apart and sends the spirits back. Once that is done we usually change make the spirit plate, and eat. Usually everyone brings a dish to share with the group. This is good way to restore you electrolytes before you drive off anywhere.
There are a lot of other sweatlodge etiquettes, but again they vary from tradition to tradition, so always ask before you enter so you do not offend anyone........... Our teachings start us off from the time the pipe is loaded and include a lot of etiquette while you are in the sweatlodge as well. It would take a million pages to go into specifics, so please ask when you come. It is not uncommon for that discussion to take place while the grandfathers are heating in the fire, hence another example of why it is good to come and help set up.......you can learn a huge amount about the ceremony by participating in it.
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