Presented by: Darwinism for the Disabled
Location: Crandall Park
Date: Sunday, September 14th
Time: 2:00 PM – 4:00 PM
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About the Event
Welcome to the First Annual Scissors Race — the community event you didn’t know you needed and definitely didn’t ask for!
This totally unnecessary, mildly reckless competition is our tongue-in-cheek way of raising awareness for Darwinism for the Disabled and our mission of embracing adaptation, inclusion, and humor in the face of life’s curveballs (or sharp edges).
Participants will sprint, jog, or briskly shuffle across Crandall Park’s great lawn… all while holding a pair of scissors (blunt safety scissors will be provided unless you bring your own vintage sewing shears, you show-off).
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Why Are We Doing This?
We believe the best way to highlight the importance of accessibility and adaptation is to… well… demonstrate why adaptation might be necessary in the first place.
Think of this as evolutionary marketing — a race to the finish that doubles as a public service announcement.
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Race Categories
The Safety Shuffle – for those who enjoy competition at a leisurely pace
Intermediate Impulse – for racers who “probably should’ve thought this through”
Darwin’s Delight – the full-speed chaos option, perfect for adrenaline junkies and insurance adjusters
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Rules & Safety
1. No running with scissors toward anyone — we’re not animals.
2. Keep points down (unless you’re in “Darwin’s Delight,” in which case… may the odds be ever in your favor).
3. Medical staff will be on standby, because we’re not completely irresponsible.
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Our Real Goal
Behind the satire, this event is about community, conversation, and recruitment for our advocacy group. We fight for accessibility, representation, and the right to laugh at life’s absurdities. If we can get you to giggle while thinking about inclusion, we’ve done our job.
Also check out other Sports events in Glens Falls, Contests in Glens Falls.
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