Listening Circle: Am I an Imposter or am I Oppressed?

Imposter Phenomenon: Am I an Imposter or am I Oppressed

Join Kris in an intimate (<5 participants) Listening Circle to explore the times we felt like an imposter, challenging the assumption that we did something wrong. This space would be most supportive for those seeking to explore their experiences of not belonging in a workplace or other spaces.

This group would be a good group for you if you resonate with the following quote and need a space to share your experience, validate, and be validated:

"The life of a minority in tech is while we’re lectured on “getting over” imposter syndrome. We politely call the environmental causes “unconscious bias,” pretending that it’s no one’s fault because everyone “means well,” like . And so we whisper amongst ourselves, develop elaborate coping mechanisms, go to therapy, and avoid the guys that everyone whispers about but who are still there—because of course they are. At the end of the day, or late into the night because we’re “leaning in,” we go home and wonder if we can do it again tomorrow...

For white men in tech, the costs of failure are low because they “must have learned,” being so “high potential,” and because, of course, they match the pattern. For those whose failures are lauded and rewarded barely less than their genuine successes, irrational over-confidence starts to seem less bizarre and more like an inevitable outcome. Meanwhile, underrepresented groups are and told to work on their imposter syndrome." - Cate Hudson https://modelviewculture.com/pieces/the-trouble-with-imposters

What is a Listening Circle?

Listening Circles are spaces for participants to develop understanding and appreciation of one another’s experiences and perspectives by listening carefully to both the ideas and the feelings that each holds concerning a topic. It is a dialogue instead of a debate, with respect and humanity at the center.

Further, Listening Circles aim at creating community and strengthening our humanity through simple acts of gathering, focusing, reflecting, speaking and listening to strengthen and deepen us, individually and collectively.

What is Attunement?

One could say it is our ability to be present to, and with, another’s expression of their experience. Through attunement we learn to listen while noticing multiple cues of communication: the stated verbal, the unstated verbal, body language, and the strength of the relationship. Attunement in Listening Circles can mirror back to the Speaker that the Speaker's experiences matters to the Listener and everyone else where. The Speaker can lean in and give voice to their experience and show up authentically. When the experience is seen as valuable and impactful, it creates a foundation of safety, allowing all participants to learn to create safety and experience safety. Attunement is that ability to See the individual and let the individual know they are Seen.

Art Credit: https://www.lesliebarlowartist.com/

Info: Welcoming and introducing all participants. We review Space Agreements and invite additional agreements from participants. Review format of Listening Circle learn how to attune to others.

Info: Everyone reflects on the Unison Reading, writing down thoughts, emotional responses, experiences, etc that the reading elicited. Kris will assign pairs to all participants to practice attunement when their partner shares and reflect back what they heard.

Info: Kris will read the Closing Reading and invite participants to reflect and share more freely, learning to connect authentically using their attunement skills. This is a time to share what insights you have gained from listening in round one (these insights are the “gifts"). There is no respondent in this round. Again, this is not a time to try to convince someone to believe differently, but to speak of thought-gifts you have received from someone in the group. The facilitator and assistant facilitator may take part in the gift sharing time after allowing all participants who wish to speak to do so. This is a time when you might ask for clarification concerning something you did not

understand. Speak only if you want to.

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