***PLEASE READ THE BELOW BEFORE ATTENDING. Not knowing the rules do not excuse you from not following them. Attending the event means you accept the rules. If you do not accept any of the below, please do not attend. Thank you.*** OK, 1 2 3 4.
LET'S RIFF IT OUT!!! (Desert/Doom style/Psychedelic style/Fuzz etc style) FFO: KYUSS/UNIDA/QUOTSA/CRO-MAGS/BLACK SABBATH ETC (yes, you can play something else than 0 3 5 and in faster tempo)
Riffers, Riffereinnes and ferocious Rifferrets!
Yes, it is time to gather again to praise THE RIFF in the loudest and friendliest jam in the Bristol Galaxy (that's what we aim for)! You know the drill... don't you?
Well... if you don't then all you have is to turn up - mics, amps, guitars, bass and drums will be provided (In C standard by default but you can retune), along with lights/galaxy projectors. Riff it out, sing it out, yell it out, bang it out, dance it out etc. - you get the idea. Of course bring your own gear too and feel free to share the riff love with the others - you don't have to share your gear, just please make it clear and watch your own gear at all times.
FEW GALACTIC JAM RULES:
- THIS EVENT IS FREE. If you arrive and are a bit lost ask about Konrad. 🙂
- YOUR TECHNIQUE IS IRRELEVANT HERE. If you have never played but want to bang an open string for 5 minutes you can. There's floor tom in front of stage if you want to drum it away. There will be 2 or more mics - you can recite, you can scream, growl, howl, yell. There will be plenty of reverb on so you can express yourself in Klingon because why not. If you are super-shredder great but don't expect it to be your solo recital. It isn't.
- THIS IS A JAM, NOT AN OPEN MIC OR RAP BATTLE EVENT. Look, I love Johnny Cash but if you will start with 'Ring Of Fire' I will cut you out UNLESS you are playing it Kyuss-style... then ok. If you really have to play Black Sabbath play something from 'Sabotage' and for Universe's sake please do not butcher it... or I will cut you out. 😃 Aaaand if you really need to rap it out go for but if you intend to go 'Rap God' for the whole evening, yeah guess what. Yeah, I will cut you out. Simple, huh?
- EVERYONE IS WELCOME BUT OBVIOUS SCVM. It is ok who you are and where you are from - you are welcome here 🙂 This of course does not apply to vandals, creeps, nazis, racists, anti-LGBT and other 'possessed' fokheads - you know what I mean? If you don't, that is your issue to deal with. There is no place for harassment ANYWHERE, and especially at event I organise.
- INCLUSIVITY IS THE MOVE FORWARD. We welcome everyone (but scvm mentioned above, right?) Be nice, kind and helpful to everyone, that's all it takes. We are here to play heavy music, laugh and be happy. 🙂 This is not a place to throw a fit - if you feel angry yell through the mic, just be sensitive about what you yell... someone may understand you know...)
- Usually THERE IS NO QUEUE, people swap amicably etc HOWEVER please note:
- NON-BINARY JAMMERS ARE WELCOME - I support non-binary people but for Riff's sake don't throw a fit if you will hear me addressing you differently/assuming anything accidentally - I never spoke English until I was 25 and my native language has completely different words for 'male'/'female' and 'man' and 'woman'. We all deal with loads of bull each day, some of us with more some with less. Just relax please and riff it out or riff it out to relax. That's what we are here for.
- LADIES/WOMEN/FEMALES/ETC FIRST. Call me what you want, this is part of my culture and tradition. To clarify: I support non-binary people (as you can see above) and I am a member of minority group myself. But your sudden epiphany-style realisation that actually you are someone else JUST to jump the queue (especially in front of tiny woman) won't cut, Clyde. Until we have parity in dudettes and dudes riffing it out in even-ish numbers, I will encourage women/females/everyone really to join onstage and will make sure they will if they only want to, trust me. You want to throw a fit over a woman/girl/non-binary person/anyone playing with you/before you? Save yourself time and frustration and stay home. Forever.
- NO COMPENSATION FOR PERFORMING. Neither monetary or any other. Yes, I buy my own drinks. The only time you will get a free pint from me is if something goes horribly wrong i.e. something breaks and you 'save the jam' i.e. hi-hat stand breaks last minute and you bring yours. Btw. we had power out once and we did jam acoustically, it was cozy. No, sabotaging gear so you can 'save' the event for a pint won't work.
- KINDNESS AND SUPPORT WILL BE REWARDED - helpful folks and frequent attendees will have the opportunity to present their projects at GALACTIC RIFF KEEPERS (1st edition soon) Please remember what kind of FFO event this is.
- DO YOU HAVE IDEAS FOR IMPROVING THE GALACTIC JAMS? DM me please. It's all about progress and making the world a better place, even if for few hours.
- NO, I WILL NOT TURN THE VOLUME DOWN - IF YOU ARE WORRIED ABOUT YOUR HEARING PLEASE ASK FOR THE EARPLUGS AT THE BAR. We are here to be loud and proud. This is aimed to be the loudest jam in the galaxy, a haw haw haw haw. 😉
Still here and you like it? Great! Not from Bristol but still liking it? How about getting in touch and play at Lion as part of Galactic Jam Present series?
Thank you for reading this Galactic Jam TedTalk.
See you all there! RIFFS RIFFS RIFFS
Konrad
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